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My husband is about the nicest person in the world. If you want a problem solved, he can figure out the solution. If you're in need of an encouraging word, he knows the right thing to say. In fact, he'd probably give you the shirt off his back, he's just that sweet.
Except in the morning. That is the time you see the dark side of the man I married - a guy I call the the doomsayer of dawn.
"I just don't remember winters being this bad before," he'll mutter as he gets dressed.…Continue
Added by Diane Majeske on January 31, 2011 at 10:40pm — No Comments
Yesterday, I sat sweating in a chair in the dentist's office. In the waiting room. Because I hate the dentist. Yes, I know. Bad. But I can't help it. I've tried to change. But I've had some negative experiences. However, I know how important the dentist is, and I'm fanatical about dental hygiene. So my kids go regularly. And they don't mind much at all.
They were both getting their teeth cleaned, and I was biding my time, taking deep breaths and reading fashion magazines.…Continue
Added by Diane Majeske on January 29, 2011 at 7:02pm — No Comments
If you're going to be an Art Mom for a group of second graders, and you sense you're losing their attention, don't try to be clever and mention Van Gogh's ear.
Just don't. Even if you feel you're doing it for the greater good. Because soon you will not be giving a presentation on art. You will be giving a presentation on ears.
Trust me. I spoke today at my son's classroom - finishing a program on color and mood that got cut short last week - and brought in a wide variety of art…Continue
Added by Diane Majeske on January 26, 2011 at 11:44pm — No Comments
I was trolling through Target recently when I noticed a few of the maternity clothes on display. No, no, I'm not in the market. But I still couldn't stop staring. Because these clothes were actually pretty. Flattering, even.
Wow. No fair.
When I was pregnant - and it really wasn't that long ago - that's not what I was seeing. I found a lot of designers who assumed that pregnant women enjoyed dressing like sailors, with blue and white blouses with bows and jaunty collars. Ugh.…Continue
Added by Diane Majeske on January 24, 2011 at 11:39pm — No Comments
I'm the one in this household who tends to value intuition. I'll admit, logic isn't always my strong suit.
I'm also interested in feng shui, find chakras fascinating, and think that yoga is a nice way to get centered.
My husband, a former sports editor, takes this all in stride with only a few surreptitious eye rolls. "At least one person in this family has logic," he'll grouse, heading off to pay bills and balance the checkbook.
So maybe that's why I thought it was so…Continue
Added by Diane Majeske on January 22, 2011 at 3:16pm — No Comments
So I finally caved and bought my daughter a Snuggie. Yes, yes, you know, those gigantic blanket things with sleeves.
Personally, I think they look just plain silly, but she's been wanting one for ages. And not just any Snuggie, of course, but the "Peace and Love" Snuggie with multi-colored peace signs all over it, if you can dig that, man.
She keeps telling me it is soooo comfortable," and that I just have to try it on.
Absolutely not. First of all, if…Continue
Added by Diane Majeske on January 19, 2011 at 11:39pm — No Comments
Tonight - another amazing performance by the fabulous Last-Minute Children!!
Sure, it's been a long weekend, but that's no reason to let mom in on the secret that there's really stinky gym clothes mouldering in your gym bag. Not until ... the last minute, of course!!
Oh, and what? There's a Tuesday quiz on kitchen measurements and some reading that's due tomorrow and maybe even a permission slip or two that needs to be signed? Ta da!! Welcome to the Last-Minute…Continue
Added by Diane Majeske on January 17, 2011 at 9:51pm — No Comments
Does yellow make you feel like a banana? Is red just like lava? And does purple make you feel like an onion? If so, then you, too, will succeed as an Art Mom in my child's classroom.
Being an Art Mom is simple: You prepare a little program that teaches the kids about artists or color or a style of art, and then develop a little project to go with it. It's a lot of fun - second graders are a very appreciative audience.
I decided to talk about color and moods - you know, how does…Continue
Added by Diane Majeske on January 15, 2011 at 11:17am — No Comments
My friend left work today, excited because she was heading straight to her new gym. For a few minutes I was envious. She would, after all, get to work out without small companions who make comments like, "Look, mom, I can stretch, too! I can stretch more than you!!" and "Wow, mom! Look how much the Wii says you weigh!!"
But then I looked outside and saw it was snowing. Again. My motivation left as quickly as it had arrived. Don't get me wrong. I want to be fit. I want sculpted arms…Continue
Added by Diane Majeske on January 12, 2011 at 8:35pm — No Comments
I had a nightmare Saturday night - jumbled, disjointed, frightening scenes. It started with our family going to a store's grand opening. It ended with me being trapped inside, watching a plane crash-land in the parking lot and skid into the building as panic and chaos erupted all around me.
I couldn't find my husband; I couldn't find my children.
In the dream, I think I was in a Wal-mart, but I might as well have been in a Safeway, because I'm sure the murderous rampage in…Continue
Added by Diane Majeske on January 10, 2011 at 8:14pm — No Comments
I grew up in a big family, and it was rare that my mom splurged on those yummy, high-priced treats like Oreos or Little Debbie snack cakes. But when she did buy them, she'd always issue a warning as she took them out of the bag - a sentence that puzzled me for years:
"I swear, I'm not going to buy these again if you're just going to eat them," she'd tell us as we hovered around her eagerly.
Cramming Oreos into my mouth, I'd just shrug. What does that even mean? My mom must be…Continue
Added by Diane Majeske on January 8, 2011 at 10:24am — No Comments
Welcome to 2011 - the year of the clean basement. No, seriously. I mean it this time.
See, it's not that our basement is dank and forbidding - far from it. On the contrary, it's a treasure trove guaranteed to suck you in.
If the children are there, we know we're doomed. Our oversized basement is toy central. Little toys, big toys, - toys that haven't been touched in years. But bring out that old stained, ragged bunny and my daughter clutches it to her chest like a…
Added by Diane Majeske on January 4, 2011 at 11:46pm — No Comments
Added by Diane Majeske on January 2, 2011 at 9:30pm — No Comments