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What are your personal boundaries with your kiddos? Something happened the other day that immediately had me pondering the issue of what's appropriate for them to witness as they get older and much more aware of their surroundings. My husband will quite likely murder me in my sleep for this post. Of course, in my opinion, it is no worse than this post I wrote a couple of months ago, so if you don't hear from me for a few days send a search party, 'kay?
I arrived home from work the other night and my husband greets me with, "I am never going to be naked around the kids again."
I should probably preface that little statement by saying that we are not nudists, not by any stretch of the imagination. We don't run around the house naked. I would rather not see my jiggly cellulite filled legs all the time, thankyouverymuch. No, but we are definitely not shy when showering and getting ready in the morning. The boys used to shower with me last summer, because I couldn't trust them alone for 2 seconds much less a six minute shower and there was no way in hell I was actually going to set an alarm and wake early just to bathe. Pfftttt. No way, jose.
But of course, the twins are growing up and noticing a lot more, shall we say, details about the human body and apparently have been doing some comparisons. Because as daddy opened the shower door that morning, Hayden (or Logan, not sure which one) said the words, "Wow, Daddy, you have a GIANT pee pee." David was mortified, so he said. "My pee pee's small daddy. Yours is giant."
So David sat down and had a discussion with his four year old sons, explaining that we don't talk about pee pees to other people. And ever since, he hasn't let them see him naked.
They have started noticing and commenting on my girl parts as well. Of course, it doesn't bother me so much. Whenever they try to touch, I tell them no thank you. Those are mommy's private parts. No touching. What's more mortifying to me, to be honest, is the pointing out of all my "dots" (freckles/moles/dimples in the ass) or my "spikeys" (stubbly haired legs in need of a razor). Thank you dear children for pointing out all of my flaws. Much appreciated.
While these issues regarding personal boundaries are pretty minor, they have me thinking about the future. And I don't know about you, but it scares the hell out of me. The thought of being responsible for teaching these little people about "good touches" and "bad touches", stranger danger, what is appropriate social conversation, and sex, is terrifying. It makes these previous four years look like a walk in the park in comparison. Seriously, all I had to do for the past few years was keep them alive and clean. Which I managed to do somewhat successfully. That was a piece of cake. Soon, I will have deal with the difficult stuff, you know the stuff that turns them into mature, moral, responsible adults and functioning members of society.
Holy shit. How do I do that? Anybody got a manual for this stuff?
Comment
Comment by Nikki T on June 17, 2012 at 12:28pm I don't know if my opinion matters here but, I do think there comes an age when you start teaching your children about privacy. My kids are a little bit older so we are past this stage, and have already entered the stage where my son runs screaming if he happens to pass my room and I am changing! My youngest has special needs so she has NOT grasped the concept of privacy yet, but we are working on it since her body is rapidly changing. I'm with you though....I wish there was a book to help me teach her why she shouldn't run through the hallway stark naked in front of her brother when shes running to the shower!

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