A Mom Blog Social Network
Spoiler Alert: There is a super cool give-away at the end of this post. So yeah, read it. Trust me, you want this.
I love hearing from people via comments on my blog – good, bad, whatever. Well, except for spam comments from the fake “luxury” handbag pushers and (authentic!) Cheap Beats by Dr. Dre offers that now flood my inbox faster than the depressing, yet oddly fascinating, stream of emails I receive from seniorpeoplemeet.com and bigandbeautifuldates.com.
Anyway, as any regular blogger knows, if you’re going to put it all out there, you have to expect hate mail now and then. I remember a few haters from the Spaces days—Barbie comment, anyone?—but it has been awhile since I’ve been stung online. Sure enough, last week I heard from the “anonymous” email@example.com who had a thing or two to say about a thing or two. The topic of her comment was “Move On.”
Yawn. But, um, moving on….
The topic and/or theme for much of my life in the past six or so months has been about moving on—whether actually physically moving from one home to another, moving out of my comfort zone into the unknown, moving to a new city/school, or—of course–moving on from a relationship.
I haven’t thought about the mean and untrue things in Pity Party’s comment much since I initially read it, but I have been thinking about the overall concept of moving on quite a bit. For months, friends have been giving me advice on how they moved on from something that was keeping them emotionally stuck. Advice, tips, tricks…I have collected quite a few ideas and put most to use. Or at least tried.
One friend suggested the “rubber band on your wrist” approach. Every time you “go there” mentally, snap the band as hard as you can—a poor man’s aversion therapy, I guess? Another idea was to write a “trigger list.” Whenever you start romanticizing “how it was” go to your list of truths of how it REALLY was. Read every single one to reset and get back on track. Schedule a regular string of trips to see friends, take weekend getaways, etc. so that you always have something to look forward to and plan for. Supposedly, at some point you realize you’ve moved on simply because you’ve, literally, kept going. Make a list of things you love doing or always wanted to do and start checking it off. Post little reminders and sayings around the house, in your car, on your mirror, at your desk, etc. Double-up on therapy. Take boxing classes. Do yoga. See an astrologist. Try acupuncture. Drink more. Drink less. Date more. Date less. And FOR CRYING OUT LOUD avoid Facebook detective work like Wal Mart on a Saturday. (That’s my tip, by the way.) I’m here to tell you—it all works whether you do one at a time, various combinations, or hell, all at once.
A friend once told me that in love and in life there is always change. And thank God for that on so many levels. Moving on doesn’t have to mean from a failed relationship. There is also moving on after a job loss, moving on after a failed attempt at trying something or an idea that just simply isn’t going to be, moving on from an unhealthy friendship, moving on from a traumatic event that has been holding you hostage. Whatever it is, someone else has been there/done that, too, and can offer advice and best of all, hope. So, yes, whatever it is that is keeping you stuck…MOVE ON. Change things. It is so very worth it.
Last night, when preparing this blog entry I started thinking of things that I want to move on from, other than the obvious condiment.
Things I am O.V.E.R. In no particular order:
My furniture. This is why I am currently working on consigning valuable items and “Craigslisting” the rest. It’s too “past.” And, baby, I’m all about the future. So what if I live in an empty house for a while? Everything that fills it in the months and years to come will be items I absolutely love.
The word “epic.”
The word “amazing.”
Staying on a bad date longer than I want to or should have to.
Wishy-washy feelings. Whether it is about a decision or a person….figure it out, go with it, stick with it.
The color brown.
One-upping and/or name-dropping. It doesn’t make you look cool. It makes you look like a jerk.
Bad hair extensions. As with most things fake, if you’re going to do it, do it right.
Excuses. When you screw up, admit it. I’ve noticed I start to get bored after about the second sentence of a lame excuse.
Pinterest. (Sorry, guys. It’s like an online version suburban mommy wars. Yep, I bought my kid’s birthday cake at Target and she freaking loved it.)
Being pissed about turning 40. I have completely shocked myself with how much I’m digging it – outside of needing Botox more frequently. Forty really IS the new 39!
Worrying (too much) about what others think. Maybe it’s a 40 thing, but while I will always be genetically inclined to worry, I’m doing so less and less. And I like it.
I could go on, but I won’t BECAUSE…. I want to hear from you. What are your tried-and-true ways of moving on? What has worked for you? Or, what is it that you are SO over? This is where you spill it. I’ll take the best stuff, run it by a panel of some pretty cool 40-somethings, and the winner will get a FREE blow-out every Friday for a month from The Do Cut and Color salon in Dallas. This is big. Huge. I want it, but can’t have it. So because I heart you so, I’m giving it to you. Just like my kids, I love all readers “just the same, honey” but let’s admit, this is a give-away that would work best for a Dallas-area dweller. But don’t fret…My next give-away works for one and all, so stay tuned and go ahead and offer up your W.O.W.’s anyway so we can all live and learn in a, hopefully, improved way.
Unless I go down in a blaze of (un) glory at my daughter’s birthday sleepover this weekend, I’ll choose and announce a winner on Monday February 4. If your comment is anonymous (trust me, that’s cool) I’ll give you a way to message me once I announce that YOU (or your gf/wife/flavor of the month) will have amazing hair for the next month!
Ready, set, ‘gimme what ya got. (This means comment. Go.)