A Mom Blog Social Network
You know that special weekend morning, the one where you wake up and can hear the kids are awake, but its 8:00 a.m. and they have left you alone? You lay there for a few minutes just listening, knowing at any moment the sound of little feet running up the hallway to your bedroom door is going to be heard. And lo and behold, silence. So on this special weekend morning, you curl closer to your husband/wife/however and make your move...
I quietly got out of bed, knowing that the slightest noise from my bedroom is going to set the radar off in my kids heads. I tiptoe to my bedroom door and slowly lock the door and just as quickly race to the bathroom to pee, without flushing the toilet of course. I know from experience that the slightest noise emitted from behind the closed bedroom door will squash any and all hope I have for getting laid. I crawl back under the covers and cuddle back up with Big Guy, running my hand on his chest with the "it's go time" touch, which he immediately recognizes and realizes that the clock is ticking. A couple of minutes into the coveted time, I hear a banging on the door, followed by a 3-year-old voice yelling, "Mommy why is this door locked and what are you doing?" Of course I am pissed, knowing this is only going to end with Big Guy and I spending the rest of the day frustrated, so I calmly reply back "we are getting dressed, be out in a minute." Of course my reply is not what my daughter wanted to hear, so the pounding on the door begins again. Big Guy, not as calmly as I, replies "we will be out in a minute," all the while determined to not waste what we started. And we didn't. To my amazement, I heard the footsteps in the hallway disappear from the door, and I got lucky on this special weekend morning.
Later in the day, I started thinking about earlier that morning and I started feeling like a teenage kid all over again. Instead of sneaking make out sessions in between my parents checking on me and my "guest" (as they would call my date), I now have to sneak sex with the Big Guy from our own kids. What the hell is this all about?! The reality of the situation is this: with five kids in my house, my sex life will, for the most part, consist of sneaking around, even in our own bedroom. Is it ideal? Of course not, but it does lead to some fun quickies and special moments for Big Guy and I. And believe me when I say, the opportunity is not wasted when, on the rare occasion, our house is kidless.