I confess... I have 3 children by 3 different men. Blessifully, (I think I just made that word up) God placed a man in my life that is able to bring a healthy balance to my crazy, dysfunctional, unorganized life. I, like many other women, have a story. My testimony. Please allow me to share.

I became a mom at the age of 20. It was my junior year of college. I managed to beat the odds and graduated a semester later than my expected graduation date. My relationship was not healthy at all. My boyfriend was a drug addict and a drug dealer with a very bad temper. I knew (like most women) that if I showed him that I loved him, then he would change. Didn't happen. He went in and out of jail. The relationship got worse, I had finally reached my breaking point, and decided that I didn't need him. It was me and my baby against the world. (On a Hardee's budget)!

My next boyfriend was different. Very attentive to me and my daughter. But he lacked one major characteristic...the desire to WORK!!! And on top of that, he was a serial burglar. So again, another one that stayed in and out of jail. Oh, I forgot, to mention, that one month after I graduated, I became pregnant with baby number two! I also got my first apartment in the projects, so of course he's got to change now right? We have a baby on the way and our own apartment, so he has to get a job now. Didn't happen. He went to jail when I was three months pregnant and was sentenced to two years in prison. Great. I'm a "ride or die chick" so I don't mind traveling to the prison to see my baby daddy. And then reality kicks me in the head.
I got tired of being alone. So I moved on. With two kids and two fathers in jail.

Then came "Mr. Man". He was a drug dealer with a nice car! He paid my $100 rent and even let me drive his car! I've hit the jackpot now!!! Nope! Long story short, I got pregnant, had an abortion (don't judge me), and got out of that sad, so-called relationship too! Lonely again. With two kids and a wounded soul.

At this point, I didn't know what to do. I always felt as if I needed a man to complete me. I remember a co-worker asking me what I wanted in a man. I couldn't answer that because I was cool with just having a man. She told me to write down all the characteristics that I wanted in a man. Then write a letter to God telling him what I wanted. Put both papers in the Bible, pray, and be patient. I did it. What did I have to lose?

After writing to God, I dated for two years but refused to force myself into a relationship until God sent me the man that he wanted me to be with. And he did!  I have been with my husband, Kenny for 6 years.  We have been married for 3 years and God blessed us with our last child one month after the wedding!  So we have 2 beautiful daughters and a handsome son!

Through all of my obstacles, I learned that I didn't need a man to complete me.  I had to complete myself first.  Then God would send someone who would be a healthy balance in my life. And I balance my husband's life as well. We are a team striving to be a happy, healthy, and wealthy family.

I confess... I'm not an expert at getting optimistic about life. In fact, I'm still a work in progress.  I am on a journey to "figure out what I want to be when I grow up". I am thinking, speaking, claiming, and working on achieving my happy space in the Universe... But there's more to me than this blog. I am a wife that is striving to be the best wife that I can be.  I am a mother of 3 that is striving to be the best mother that I can be. I'm designing my own lane in the Universe because I just don't fit into any other lanes that have already been created. I'm being the best me that I can be. And I'm dedicated to helping you be the best you that you can be.

So, let's go on this journey together. Allow me to empower you. Allow me to motivate you. Allow me to inspire you. And I will allow you to do the same for me. That is what being a G.O.A.L. Model is all about! Getting Optimistic About Life and modeling for others how life is supposed to be.

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Comment by Chelle on July 26, 2011 at 8:28pm

Girl, no judging here! As a good friend of mine recently told me, as I shared some of the mistakes I've made: "You act like everyone else out there leads a perfect life. They don't." That really put things in perspective for me. 

So glad I came across this post! It came at a great time in my life!

Comment by Nikki Tapscott on July 26, 2011 at 8:14pm

Good for you!! So wouldn't judge you on your journey.  We all have our crazy choices and they may seem right at the time but not so good later on.  I too have made "wrong" choices and learned huge lessons from them but I am now in a healthy place too.  

I would love to join you on your empowering journey :)

much love

nikki

www.mindsetforlife.wordpress.com

www.undergroundfitness09.blogspot.com

 





 

 

 


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