Divorce is becoming more of a reality each year, and it’s time not to treat this as an unthinkable outcome, but a possibility. According to the National Center For Health Statistics, 813,862 divorces took place in 2014. This number was nearly half of the marriage rate for that particular year. We can’t predict what directions a relationship will go in or what may lead to a divorce. What we can do is understand that a divorce can go in many directions as well. Keeping a stable dialogue with your partner and hiring legal professionals to help you understand and arbitrate the law is key. A bad divorce’s consequences can be enormous for your family—emotionally and financially. However, you can stave off of many of these problems.
One thing that you need to do is research the legal rights you have as well as the divorce process wherever you live. What you need to realize is that there are many pop-culture myths about divorce, as well as regional and state differences.
Depending on where you live, some of the basic things you believe about divorce may not be true. For example, according to Mike Miller, a Family lawyer in Denver, “Colorado no longer uses the term “visitation” to define the time a parent spends with his or her child. The key issue in visitation rights is the ability to work together without animosity and without poisoning a child’s relationship with the other parent. It is in your interest to demonstrate to the court that you can do this.”
The good news is that we live in an age where it is easier to access legal advice than over. The bad news is that you will need a legal professional to help you filter this advice to find what is pertinent to your case as well as what is best for you. Be sure to interview more than one attorney before you plan to file for divorce. The best choice isn’t always the most expensive one, and depending on what you and your partner have together, you may want to hire a lawyer with different levels of expertise. For example, a couple that started a business together but has no kids will have very different needs than a family with four kids.
In addition, the days of the shark lawyer are over. 90% of divorce cases end in settlement no matter your representation. Consider a lawyer or professional mediator to help you divvy up your belongings as peacefully as possible.
Along with knowing everything you need about the legal process, you also want to avoid falling into a negative mindset of hurting or “beating” your former partner during the divorce, particularly if things become protracted. Divorce is not a failure, so try to avoid coloring it those terms. If you are having a truly difficult time staying positive, making some shifts may be exactly what you need.
Exercise more: This may seem a bit silly, but more and more links are being found between physical exercise and mental health than ever. You don’t have to do a lot, just around 30 minutes of walking a week. If you want, bring other people into it to support your social life.
Organize your lifestyle: A big part of helping work through a divorce is trying to minimize your outside stresses. This doesn’t mean you won’t get stressed, just that it can happen. Be sure to keep your records about your divorce case organized, then extend that to your other documents. Consider extending this to your home, then creating a daily routine to match. Organization means less unexpected hassles, and this means less unneeded stress for your stressful time.
Keep positive people around: Don’t be afraid to lean on the positive people on your life. It can be tempting to fall into isolation, but try to avoid this trap. Accept invitations from friends and family for outings. If you really need help, consider a therapist or other mental health professional.
Yunas Chaudhry is a super-connector with Darkroom Clicks Photographers in Islamabad and Lahore who helps businesses find their audience online through outreach, partnerships, Photography, branding and networking. He frequently writes about the latest advancements in digital marketing, digital photography,.